Strategies, tips, and transormational teachings
to help you break free and be unstoppable!


Posted on October 24, 2017 by breakfree in Categories: Faith

black-girl - Ashley Winston - Christian Coach and Breakthrough Strategist
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Pinterest
  • LinkedIn

There is nothing fun about ruining a new pair of pants the first time you wear them.

A few Sundays ago, I went to church wearing a new pair of beautiful flowy pants. They were just the right style and fit. A bunch of people complimented them at church…I felt great in them.

These pants were perfect.

After church, I grabbed lunch with a girlfriend. We were having a great time discussing different parts of the sermon from that morning. All of a sudden I felt something dripping onto my leg. I reached underneath the table and discovered that this mystery substance was also sticky. Gross! So, I looked down and discovered about thirty different dark black dots that strongly resembled car oil had dripped down from my thigh to my ankle. My once perfect pants were ruined.

I was irritated. Every woman knows how difficult it can be to find a good pair of pants and now mine were spoiled.

In my irritated state I rambled to myself, “What is this? Will this stuff even come out? These pants were expensive and I don’t want to buy another pair. I don’t even know if they’ll have another pair!”

My friend responded to my frustration sincerely.

“All you need is some soap and water,” she reassured me.

I thought, “Yeah, right.This looks like oil! Soap and water are not going to get this out.”

But eventually I yielded to her suggested and got to scrubbing.

The stain started to lift slowly but not all the way.

I grew even more frustrated.

Now, I was not only dirty but I had a HUGE wet spot from scrubbing, right between my thighs all the way down to my ankle. At this point it looked like I had wet myself. I was uncomfortable and self-conscious.

I started to think about all of the other tasks I wanted to accomplish after lunch. But with my dirty wet pants, I was ready to go home! Deep down inside I knew it would be silly to give up on the day just because of my pants. So, eventually I recommitted in my heart to finish the day strong – wet pants and all. I made up my mind to just let it go.

I continued to scrub until the rest of the stains started to disappear. Although, there was still no guarantee that the pants would fully recover. I would have to wait for the pants to completely dry in order to find out.

My friend continued to encourage me. We paid the bill and left the restaurant.

As I headed to my car, I prayed silently, “Lord, is this the season we’re in? Where I have to move forward when I feel absolutely ridiculous, uncomfortable and slightly irritated? Concerned that everyone will see my “dirty spots”, my flaws and imperfections.”

I heard the Lord say, “Yup. Ashley, you are in a season where you must move forward beyond your discomfort – beyond your need to have everything perfect. Move forward in your flaws and in your awkwardness. Move forward even when you’re concerned about what others will think.”

Isn’t that how life is with God? He makes us move forward in our mess so that He can make a masterpiece.

After all, if everything was based on us “getting it right”…how would He ever get the glory?

I don’t know what you’re afraid of other people thinking, seeing or knowing about you…

The details of that terrible divorce…

The job you were fired from…

The imperfections of your body or face….

The abuse you experienced as a child…

But just know that whatever “it” is, that it doesn’t disqualify you from being everything that God has called you to be.

You are enough. Just the way you are. Move forward and let God turn your mess into something meaningful.

Remember – He is more concerned with your progress than your perfection.

Until Next Time…


Side Note: I finished the day with my wet pants and all. No one even seemed to notice. In fact, I received more compliments. What are you struggling with? What do you want to achieve? Simply drop a comment below & I promise to help you as much as I can!


  1. Willona Booker says:

    Great read Ashley! You are so right. I have tried to be a perfectionist and learned that it is getting me no where. Meeting you has been a true Divine connection. Since we first spoke in March 2016, you helped me become aware of a lot of things I was not aware consciously that played apart in why and who I was. I was holding on to a lot of hurt and disappointment. You helped me get through that. I am still uncovering a lot of habits that I was unaware of, but it all started with my Breakthrough with you! If I had not made the decision to jump and invest in myself who knows where I would be.

    • breakfree says:

      Willona! To God be the Glory! I am so happy that you are progressing and growing in God. He is faithful! I am so glad that you decided to participate in 90 Day Get Unstuck! That is my favorite program! I am always revisiting the content and workbook myself lol. I am glad that what you learned in the program is still benefiting you today! God is truly awesome. Keep Going!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Connect With

  • In the social media world, we face thousands of opinions about who we should be, what we should look like, or what we should have accomplished by now. There’s a huge temptation to compare ourselves with others, question our significance and so many wonder if they’ll ever break free from what other people think.

Nobody really wants to talk about this (because many leaders are struggling with this too), but it’s trueeeeee…😓 It’s time to stop listening to these voices! A few years ago, God led me to write a women's devotional all about this type of stuff. Let’s just say it was not my best work. Have you ever looked at your old journals and been like 🙃😬? Anyway, I reworked it and with a little bit of elbow grease and vulnerability, it’s finally finished just in time for women’s month. Sorry fellas, you know who runs the world. Just kidding. 🤗

The You Are Enough mini devotional takes you through 15 days of encouragement that will help you embrace your identity in Christ with confidence. 💪🏽 Stay tuned! Coming March 2019! 📅
  • Come BE F E A R L E S S with me March 15th & 16th at Wheaton Christian Center. I am super excited about speaking at this amazing conference hosted by the wonderful @graciouswomenministry. Plus, I'll be doing a BOSS UP VIP life and business coaching intensive for a small group of women during lunch (spots are limited and you gotta sign up through the conference app for that). Listen...if you are trying to get your life in 2019 you need to be there. 👏🏾 It's time to take our faith to another level!The link to register is in my bio. 🔗 #HappyMonday
  • Happy Valentines Day! 💕

It’s February 14th so you know what today means! And if you thought the Break Free podcast, you’re absolutely right!  The Real Relationship Talk Part 2 is now live. If you have an ear to hear, 👀 check out the episode at the link in my bio.
  • Rise and Shine! ☀️I hope your week is off to a great start. Meanwhile back at the ranch, I’m still being tortured by @iamfly_ 😖 It's my first week back since early December...y’all pray my strength. 
The struggle is real 👏🏾 Becoming stronger requires us to be uncomfortable for a period of time! In order to build new strengths, we have to break old mindsets and habits. 
When we embrace the conditioning in our spiritual gym necessary for the journey, we unlock our full potential. There is always a process before progress. Stick with it! #HappyTuesday #HealthIsWealth
  • *clears throat* (drum roll please)


I know I fell off (majorly 😬), BUT join me on the 1st of every month for real talk about REAL life! If you’re new to Break Free Be Unstoppable, the Break Free podcast is all about showing up, telling the truth and doing the work so that we can live God’s best for our lives.

In the show, you’ll hear stories and get practical advice on how to apply biblical principles so that you can see yourself the way that God sees you, elevate your faith, and align your actions with what you say you want so that you can unleash your unstoppable.💥 February’s episode will actually be released on Valentine’s Day for The Real Relationship Talk Pt. 2 with my friend and licensed clinical therapist, @tiffanyeverage. Get ready for the laughs! I can’t wait for you to tune in. 🎧
  • I’m going back to Cali 🎶😎🌴 Cause ya girl is tired of this -35-degree weather in Chicago! Last month, I took a trip to LA and I had the 👏🏾best 👏🏾time! I wasn’t sure if I was going to take the trip cause Cali ain't cheap especially after Christmas 😅, but I felt led to step out in faith and God surprised me in so many more ways than I can explain in this post cause y'all only got a 2-second attention span on IG. 🤣

But let me just encourage you.

Don’t look at what you have naturally. Sometimes, you have to step out in faith and trust God even when things don’t make sense. Of course, you have to use wisdom, but when you feel God leading you to do something, timing is everything. Make the move.

Like I always say, He knows the plan! Be open to whatever He wants to do in your life this year and watch Him respond to your faith in His ability and not your own willingness to make something happen. He might even take you to Cali 🏄🏾‍♀️ or Cambodia! 👀

Pin It on Pinterest